Wednesday, February 01, 2006

You're a Member of the Press... 

Hypothetical. You're with the press, and you're walking down the street one day, when you chance upon a man with a rifle -- an automatic rifle -- swearing up a storm about how he's gonna find himself some Jews to shoot. No, better yet, he's got a box of dynamite, a bomb, and he's muttering about blowing up a synagogue. And it's not just one guy, it's a bunch of them, like some sort of a Klan procession.

It could happen.

Masked Palestinian militants from the Islamic Jihad, some dressed as suicide bombers, carry the body of Nidal Abu Saada, Islamic Jihad's West Bank leader, during his funeral in the village of Illar near the West bank town of Tulkarem Wednesday Feb. 1, 2006. Abu Saada was killed, with another Islamic Jihad militant, Tuesday by Israeli troops during a raid in a village near Jenin. An Islamic Jihad leader in Gaza, Abu Walil, threatened revenge. (AP Photo/Nasser Ishtayeh)
Now think quick, Mr. Reporter Slash Photographer, what do you do?

  1. Back away slowly and call the cops right away so they can come arrest them before anyone is harmed.
  2. Go Jean Claude Van Damme on them all by your heroic self.
  3. Try to talk them out of an immoral act, taking notes the whole time so you can write a best-selling memoir of the whole experience, should you survive the encounter.
  4. Drop your camera and throw up your arms yelling "I'm uncircumcised!" before running screaming in the opposite direction.
  5. Flash your press pass and ask if they could pose for a few pictures. Then, while taking the pictures, try to find out where they plan to place the bombs so you can get there before those jerks from AFP, and maybe even angle for an exclusive pre-crime interview so you'll have something to sell to Oprah.
Or maybe you just pray they're only playing dress-up, and the explosives aren't real, but snap the photos anyway cuz they're just so darned photogenic. I know I would.

If you really, really liked this -- or even really, really hated it -- there's lots more: