Wednesday, February 15, 2006

McDonald Murdered in Cartoon Protests 

WARNING: Photo depicts graphic death of famous corporate spokescharacter. Not for the squeamish.

Protesters wreck the property of a McDonald's franchise after beating Ronald McDonald to death with sticks and burning his lifeless body to protest Danish cartoons and increased prices on Super Size Big Mac Combo Meals in Lahore February 14, 2006. Police used tear gas to drive out students who stormed into Islamabad's diplomatic enclave on Tuesday and protesters attacked Western businesses in Pakistan's most violent reaction yet to cartoons of the Prophet Mohammad. REUTERS/Mian Khursheed
Jack, of Jack in the Box fame, and the Burger King were seen fleeing for their lives in the direction of the US embassy. Rumors that Colonel Sanders has gone into hiding are unfounded, as the Colonel is actually already dead and therefore impervious to rekilling. Some analysts are suggesting that the Colonel's tactics may point the way to a solution to the global crisis: blame everything on people who are already dead.

Protesters on the scene remarked, "Die, Infidel scum, die, we will hack you to death with machetes for the Honor of the Prophet (may your pieces be upon him)."

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